i wish i knew what to do.

the title says it all, one the one side i want to go for it and ask and see where it leads. however on the other side if i do it jeperdise our friendship and i dont know if she feels the same way. i am in quite a pickle because these feelings are so stong and ive never felt anything like this before. and it hurts that im not with her.

meh..

well folks, hope you had a happy halloween. then it'll have been better than mine, which started off well but then suddenly something happens and next thing you know your as depressed as you get and you don't know what to do next. it wasn't the greatest day of my life thats for sure, but hopefully i can move on, get over it and try to cheer myself up. i'm ok as long as im around someone but when alone or in my owwn head for too long i am just fundamentally unhappy with myself, i wish it could all be avoided from here on in. however it doesn't work that way. i'm drawn to the cause in a way i can't describe and my outer shell keeps all signs of unhappyness at bay until i'm alone again.

damn

well, it may aswell be official, there is no chance. it was over before it could begin...

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